Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Giardia Shimardia

Rob Cain strides his way to a win at the Mt. Diablo 50 Mile Endurance Run in northern California.

This just in...

Get a hernia operation and follow it up with a bout of Giardia. It'll get you a personal record and a win!!!

Ashland's Rob Cain has tried everything in the past.

"I needed to jump start my training. I felt a cut in the gut, followed by some staples, and then quickly losing ten pounds in three weeks was the way to go. Western States 100 Miler is only weeks away. It is imperative that I get a leg up on all the fast guys who are going to be there this year. I'm 55 now, drugs might come into play after I reach 60, but right now I'm still in my prime."

Thus Rob launched his new training method. He's patented the technique, so to all you other athletes out there, make sure you get his permission before embarking on this plan.

Rob tested his revolutionary new idea at this past weekend's Mount Diablo 50 Mile Endurance Run. Set in the San Francisco Bay area; Mt. Diablo's trail course rises for over 13,000 feet. Temperatures on Sunday's race rose to over 90 degrees. Neither the net altitude gain nor the temps made Rob falter.

Rob runs through the heat at Diablo.

Rob was heard saying after he returned home, "Most folks would crumple under conditions like that. I lost more water weight while I battled that darn Giardia bug. The soreness in my quads in the last few miles of the race was a welcome relief compared to the pain I endured while the doctor placed that metal mesh in my belly after the hernia operation! This was a piece of cake!"

Cain passes through an aid station.

And so it must have been a cake walk for Cain. He ran nearly an hour faster than last year at the same race and he placed second overall; first male. Congratulations Rob! We can't wait to see how you present your next training plan. Full race results can be found here.

Note: Rob never said any of these things, but I'm sure he would have had we given him the chance. Cheers!

5 comments:

Craig Thornley said...

SLF is a:

1. Studly Little Fella.

2. Skinny Little Fart.

3. Sexy Lean and Foxy.

...

John Price said...

What a performance by someone who rates well beyond middle age white guy on the Jenn scale! He's definitely set the bar really high for the rest of us middle age+ white guys! Well done!

Craig Thornley said...

4. Sandbagger, Lady shoe wearer, Farter.

5. Susan's Love Fable

John Price said...

Craig-I vote for #4-although he needs to work on the farting.

Sean Lang said...

Where is the water source that contained the magic parasite that allows one to run so strong? Is it the Lithia Water?